Sloshing Around

There are times when you wonder if anything makes any sense around you… and then perhaps you think that you are the one not making sense and that begins the internal search through past philosophies and theories and you wonder about your own sense of convictions…and then ask: am I supposed to rearrange my purpose?

Am I too close to the madness?

Are the reasons I question my convictions because I see and feel turmoil due to a once smooth ride that became bumpy and uncomfortable?

Yes to all of those questions.

And the reasons are simple:  life experiences and gained knowledge provide perspectives that add to and/or take away things that made sense previously…  with the passage of a day or an event or an experience or a conversation the once firm conviction or truth has evolved into a question…

I wish I had one of those minds that just sloshed around through life with a smile and laughter not giving much thought to the notion that one morning the sun may not show up… or my confidence in the decision I made yesterday was the right one...  and today I didn’t have any regrets or questions for making a decision this moment that will affect tomorrow…

How does one’s mind process knowledge and understanding?

There are piles of books, research papers and scientific reports that explain this notion of processing knowledge and understanding.

I pick up a book to read about it and then after absorbing a chapter or two I am more confused than before…  I simply want to say “because that is the way it is!”

But because a human mind processes what it sees, hears and feels that answer doesn't satisfy... our hearts are often in constant battle with our minds... feelings have no place in a logical discussion. Perhaps humans have no place in a logical world. Humans are walking, talking feelings... we are simply sloshing around trying to make sense of feelings...